31 Jul 2013

Patience is a Virtue

Argh yup.

I'm not a patient person. I keep wishing for Ivy to be 5 years old so I can explain things to her and do more fun things together.

But that's just plain silly! There are challenges at every age, and they grow quickly enough as it is!

So here's to a having a bit more patience. With her sleep, her grizzles and her short attention span.

She's only a baby after all!

Es ♥

27 Jul 2013

Why I Left Facebook

It's been a year since I left Facebook and I thought that this would be a good time to reflect on why I am still not a part of arguably the biggest platform in social interaction we have today.

I was pretty addicted. Maybe I was a little bored in my life, or maybe I was feeling lazy about seeing people, but it was great to just log on and instantly catch up on the gossip. From my desk, I could easily see who was engaged, pregnant, travelling, injured, bored or boring. Without seeing anyone in person, I knew when they had had surgery, what they named their child, how delicious their holiday-cocktails looked and conveniently I never forgot a birthday *thanks Facebook*. It was great.

Then a funny thing happened. I caught up with friends at dinner where two of us were there early. The conversation went like this:
Friend - 'So, you're having trouble with your gallbladder eh? Surgery next month? Bummer.'
Me - 'Yeah, it sucks. And you? I heard you're off overseas again? And you had a great weekend at that new bar...'
After about 30 seconds we were out of things to say. We knew it all, because we had been somewhat over-sharing our lives on Facey. Two of Sydney's most talkative people had run out of conversation. Oh dear.

This was worrying, but it wasn't the only reason to leave. There were people on there who really annoyed me. Let's just say their 'online persona' was rather unrelenting, so I blocked them. Not a problem, still stayed on Facebook. But there were other annoyances. I had them narrowed down to a top 3:
1. People who used pictures of their babies as their profile pic. You are not a baby. Also related to this is endless postings of pictures of said-baby. Note the use of the word endless. A few is fine. 50 in one album upload is excessive.
2. The engagement ring 'hand-only' photo. Ew. Show me your ring with your face in it please! Or better yet, don't take a deliberate photo of it at all, and tell people they will have to see it in person, probably at your engagement party.
3. The rants. Political or otherwise. And related to this is the soap-boxing.

Also, I managed to get entangled in my one of my main rules - friending work colleagues. It's a no-go-zone. It means you can't update your profile during work hours, because they will assume you've been on there all day. You can't upload anything personal. And there is a danger if you post Sunday drinks pictures on your page. You can guarantee that you've lost your chance to take a sickie on Monday.

I also hate that the words 'friending' and 'unfriending' make sense  to us now. That grammar ain't right.

Let's be honest though. Really I was worried that with the impending baby-dom, and endless hours at home, I would become one of those people with the 50-pictures-per-album of their child. And even if I did manage to keep it to a minimum, Facebook then owns those pictures of our baby.

So I quit. And it hasn't bothered me at all. When I see people I haven't seen in a long while, I am genuinely interested in their news. I hear about engagements in person and I can get excited for real all up in their faces. And isn't it nice to see a new baby in person, not on the screen? I think so. You can't cuddle a screen.

Of course, there are those interstate or overseas who I don't get to see (or cuddle) in person very often. I miss Facebook for that. But then, there's Skype and the good old email. And an excuse to travel more, right?

Es ♥

25 Jul 2013

Meditating on an Idea

Ivy slept through the night last night. From 7pm to 6.30am. No feed (she usually has one feed or sometimes two), no waking. She's always been a good night-sleeper, but this was something else. Needless to say, my boobs were very full.

We are also in the process of trying to lengthen day naps. It's only been a couple of days, but inch by painful-inch, we might be getting somewhere. Basically, in the last few days things are looking really good on the sleep-front.

We are blessed to have a baby who likes her night-time sleep. We put her down and aside from one or two 'dummy re-inserts' we usually don't hear from her. But day-sleeping is another thing all together... so now I'm nap-educating her. Yep, pay attention tiny-student and do what I say!

Interestingly, the naps work (as in, are longer) when I'm in the house meditating, which I have just re-started in the last few days. Once, I got stuck in her room after settling her (her door squeaks so I was trapped) so I just decided to do my meditation in her room (out of her sight though). So interesting. As soon as I sat down she was quiet. Aside from a few snorts and shuffles in her sleep, it was all-quiet for another 30 minutes. I was totally amazed. Same thing this morning, except I was not in her room, however the feeling in the apartment was calm.

So it got me thinking about why. We could talk about calm energies or cosmic help from above, or even my faith that she will just learn to sleep better during the day. We could say it was the power of positive thinking, or even help from God. Really, it's all possible. But I think it has something to do with me. When I meditate I see things differently. I concentrate on the breath in and out of my nose and that's it. I put my anxieties and thoughts aside and just be. I think babies can feel this. When you're calm, they're calm. Not so easy to do when they are wailing and carrying on, but I allow myself this time to just de-frag my brain computer so I can better handle situations.

Meditation is not for everyone, but it should be. It shouldn't be hard, but it is. We fill our down time with TV, books, food, exercise, phone calls, games, facebook... anything but just stopping for even 20 minutes to just breathe. It's actually really hard to do, in a weird way. But I am really cherishing having it back in my life.

Life sure ain't perfect [this post was interrupted many times by a non-napping child], but it's all about how you handle the knocks. I've not been handling them well lately, so rather than trying to eat or shop my way through it, I'm going inside to face things head on. Gently though, one breath at a time.

Es ♥

19 Jul 2013

French Children

I can't put this down.

I really liked the 'French Women Don't get Fat' book, and although this is a different writer, obviously some of the themes are the same.

If you have babies, or planning to make some, I would recommend this.

Es ♥

17 Jul 2013

Current Obsessions

I want these Hasbeens... (am clearly pining for Spring)

How cool is this kid's room...

I want to get some spray-paint-DIY happening on some bottles...

And I think it's time for a book club!

Es ♥

14 Jul 2013

Having a Baby is Selfish

Well, it is! If you're a lady and you want to be a mamma, have you asked yourself why? All the reasons are ultimately a bit self-centered - to expand your family, to have someone that you made in your own image, growing a family to pass on your name and traditions...  AND YET There are so many unwanted children in this world who need mums and dads to love and care for them. Ethically and ecologically speaking, our population is already to big for the way we consume the planet's resources. Really, a less-selfish thing to do would be to have no babies at all, or to be a mamma to another person's child who can't care for them.

But, we want babies from our own loins. Tiny people who look like us. People we can say, "Oh, he's just like my uncle the way he does that!" or "She laughs like me!" People we can love and be proud of because they are extensions of us. One thing I have realised though, is that your baby is your baby no matter where they come from. Several of our family friends have adopted and of course love their babies as much as I love mine. They don't need to look like you for you to love them unconditionally. The protective-hormones just kick in and all of a sudden you would thrown yourself under a car for them. Loins or not, it takes time to really bond with your bub (biologically yours or not) but once you do, that's it... it's love.

So back to my original point. Baby-making is selfish. And yet, here's the irony. Once the baby is born, you cease to exist, except to keep them alive and happy. It ain't about you anymore. Ever. So the selfish desire totally backfires in a way and you end up as some kind of milk-producing servant to a tiny human who can't even say thank you. This idea has given me a lot of laughs. At my own expense. I'm weird like that.

Es ♥

"What are you writing'? Mum, you're crazy."

"Actually I see your point. You are my milk-slave."

9 Jul 2013

Cooks River

We decided on Sunday that we wanted to go for a pram-friendly walk. We thought about the Bay Run, but we've done that a lot, so we looked for a new option. When we lived in Marrickville, we meant to check out the Cooks River walk, but never got around to it. But on Sunday we went down to explore!

It was a perfect winter day - warm in the sun, no rain, just lovely. We drove to Tempe train station, then just a minute or so further south, just over the river. That's the start of the Cooks River Cycle-Way. Going west, it stretches all the way to Homebush. Going east, you can walk or ride to Botany Bay and Mascot. We went west, and walked along the river to the Hurlstone Park area. It was just wonderful. I had to feed Ivy halfway, and I must say that it was the nicest view I've ever had breastfeeding! 

The walk is flat, wide enough for bikes and was full of kids, runners, and people playing sport at all the ovals we passed. We got really excited about Ivy growing up and running around with our (future) dog. Life is good!

Es ♥

1 Jul 2013

Game of Thrones

Holy heck. We just finished watching season 3. If you're not watching this series, then you are a crazy person. The second last episode alone will make you go "OH MY FREAKING GODS OF OLD", but the whole damn series is pretty good.

No spoilers, so I wont risk writing any more (I know what I'm like).